^{Picture found on instagram and edited to look like this. (done last week with Lennert)}

Right now I am sitting in my new house in Brussels. It is a beautiful place. My room is small, with a raised floor and tatamis inside. It is a really peaceful room. The last week has been intense, fun and strange. Its been a lot to be back in Belgium, come home, see my parents, my sister and her new appartment, go to gent and see M and S there, then go on to Brussels and see M, S (different ones), go to an opening and then out for drinks with M and L too, then sleep at S’s, Then go to my new place, get to know the people living there, go back home to write two big ass applications a whole day, then get the last of my stuff and move ‘officially’ to my new spot. That last part was today, I woke up in Waregem and collected my stuff, made bangin ass pesto and took the bike on the train to brussels. It was already well past noon by the time I arrived. I unpacked some stuff and went biking around looking for a boulangerie. Foudn one eventually and made my way back home with some bread. Ate and then jumped on the bike to PULP where S works. M and W were there too, first time I met W. Super nice and cool. S gave us a bunch of free stuff and we hung around there for a while. Then M and me took the metro to his car to drop off some of stuf that was in his car at my new place. Was a cosy ride. Then reunited with W and S, we hung out longer and ended up getting a drink at KIOSKradio before saying bye. At home N went out of her way to be really welcoming and I really appreciate it 🙂 Im happy and tired and a bit scared for the time that will come in the next months.

This way of existing is something I’m not used to anymore. I don’t really know what I mean exactly with ‘this way’. Its maybe a way of having a past with people and places that demands a lot more precision and attention in some way. It makes me doubt myself in my comfort. In a way I am a lot more insecure. If these people and places were to reject me, I would have nothing at all to be rooted in. In a place like berlin my social survival skills kind of kicked in and I had no qualms about being super social, inserting myself and doing what is necessary to establish social connections quickly, but in this situation that doesn’t matter at all. This is what I mean when I say ‘precise’ I guess. Ive been conditioned to function in another register. A very non-Belgian one in some way hahaha.