^{drawing i made today after ten needles were put in my ears and one between my eyes. (real)}

These days the first thing I do when I wake up is jumprope. For some reason it is really hard in the morning. My coordination is bad en then the rope hits my toes and it hurts but something about the ritual works well, maybe the pain? Then I ate and surfed the web in search of interesting drawing clubs / get togethers for me to join. They are either expensive or either drawing faces. Both lame. Then I worked on an application for a nice looking magazine. When that was done I got ready to go outside and got to talking with Aline in the meantime. It feels like she is struggling, and also like I don’t really have the energy to properly be there for her. I don’t have the energy to do that much when it comes to others I feel like. I biked to a cafe I had never been to and had a long call with fin. really nice to hear from her. Then I worked some, then passed by daadgalerie to see the Harmony Holiday video playing there about Thelonious monk. An incredible piece. Briefly talked to the curator and then went home to eat something before leaving again to an ear acupuncture session in ‘casino for social medicine’. A really beautiful place and there a group of people gathered to get needles in their ears. It was the first time I ever experienced any acupuncture. It was a really interesting experience and sense of awarenes, was very much feeling the flow of energy. After I stayed there and drew for quite a long time. When that was done I was going home when my parents called. Had a call with them for a while and then went home. At home cooked delicious food in preparation for X that will arrive tomorrow. I am a bit scared for that. I am somewhat lonely and I fear that seeing X will intensify that feeling intensely. I know we love each other intensely and that can be painful.